Dyniss

I recently accepted a 2nd promotion at work, which means I must be doing something right there. But my artistic activities continue to dwindle as my focus shifts further toward my job. There has been increasingly less time for songwriting, recording, show bookings, or website maintenance.
When I first started at Corporation X, I had trouble adjusting to the culture. Take the average worker’s attitude toward green thinking. I could not believe how my white-collar co-workers disposed of so many coffee cups every day. 1 or 2 per worker? And not even recycle them? So I strode around with my travel mug, quipping about its benefits, and dutifully/proudly bringing it to the coffee shop myself each morning, hoping everybody would notice and catch on.
(insert loud buzzing game-show loser sound here)
I’ve always said to people, “Environment supports itself” — meaning that if you’re surrounded by people who like to walk around picking their noses, they will likely continue to pick their noses. If somebody says to a room full of nose-pickers, “Hey, you know that’s unhygienic,” they will tend to ignore the upstart because majority rules.
Here is the sad part of my story: I have joined the corporate majority in various ways, and I justify it regularly. Thanks to two years of influence, I now buy my tea from the coffee shop in disposable cups. I do recycle the carboard body of the cup, but the plastic top — which I at first out of guilt carried regularly to the plastic recycler — now gets thrown in the garbage.
How can this change of attitute be?
My hypothesis:
1. Desire to earn money through stable employment;
2. Willingness to join corporate environment;
3. Subsequent desire to increase work output to increase rate of earning money;
4. Loss of personal time as a result.
I believe that it is the shortage of time that has ultimately sucked me into the herd mentality.
There is an expression that says, “time is money”, which I am living now, as do most people I work with. You can never do “enough” work in the sort of job I’m now in. Anything that distracts you from your work is a bad thing.
In the good old days after university when I had erratic/fewer hours producing audio, I had the time to be the Green Guy I wanted to be. Hey, I could wash that travel mug! I could make that extra walk to the recycler! I could ride my bicycle instead of getting on a motorized vehicle, or I could participate in more pro-environment activities like clean-ups or marches, and I could have more personal time to do creative things.
My focus on money has sucked me into the part of society I always wanted to avoid. I even catch myself looking at people like the “old” me with a bit of, “Oh, grow up”. Unbelievable! I don’t believe I have only grown up.
So — I still want to follow point (1.), even after my personal debts have been eliminated. But I’m not willing to work for peanuts just to do something eco-friendly, and I’m not willing to work so hard that I can’t have the extra time to be the responsible creature I want to be.
Oh Green Guy, how will I revive you?